seriously?

me and cate blanchett man. me and cate blanchett.

but hey. i guess i can be an ethereal blonde white woman if C can be gabrielle union.

mi corazon

me, too, little man. me too.
and no, that is not my rock. and no, i don't have anything else more exciting going on in my life.
weighing in at 8lbs, 3oz ...

enzo rockin' a fauxhawk

have i mentioned, i adore this child?

i'm riiiiich, beyotch!

one of my clients is super late on my payment and owes me $550. i know it's not a *huge* amount of money ... but come ON. that's exactly why i should be paid promptly! it's only $550!!!!!!!

of course, said client just lost the editorial director for its hoity-toity-supposedly-groundbreaking-wondrous new arts glossy. and the megalomaniacal owner of the media company that operates said client just spent a gazillion dollars on a new european compound for herself, but apparently does not think it important to pay her freelancers. i have two friends employed by said client, so there's more to worry about than just my money. i worry for their jobs. so, i know it's bigger than me and the several other freelancers that are missing their paychecks. said client has many issues.

but still. gimme mah money, bitches!

$550! that's half a month of rent! half my ticket to visit my family! more than a month's worth of groceries! 2 months worth of cell phone, cable, electric and gas bills! 7 metrocards! or even ... 3 pairs of overpriced jeans! 5 of those luscious tufi duek cashmere cardigans! 2 kitchenaid stand mixers! 4 necklaces from the frank gehry tiffany collection! one of those cute assymmetrical sporty marc jacobs jackets for winter! a sleek new theory suit! one-quarter of my way to my much-lusted after white leather valentino tote bag! a 5-piece le creuset cooking set! a year's worth of wine club membership to chelsea wines! or ... THIRTY lipglosses, balms, stains, plumpers, fillers, pencils!

not that i ever think about buying those items. not that i even think about, or even longingly would ever spend that money on anything so frivolous as lipgloss or a $2000 bag or a $250 sunshiney yellow stand mixer when i could feed myself for almost two goddamn months on that money. so seriously. PAY ME, YOU NUMNUTS!!!!! i've sliced people for less.

in other news, after an experience with a bosc pear at lunch, i've decided i only enjoy crunchy pears in salads, not as a main event. i have also re-confirmed that my family is certifiable and that i am going to be the only sane influence on my gorgeous nephew, that my nam-ja is wonderful and astonishing, and that any and all hurts can be healed with a 7-hour brunch with the three most phenomenal women in the world. yay, chosen few.

definition of douchebag

this dood sent an 11-page resume and this video as an application to UBS. chump.

eemo! i'm an eemo!

an EEMO!!!!!!!

lorenzo lino brigode came into the world at 5:31pm on oct. 11, weighing 7 pounds, 4 ounces, and purple as a grape. he's got curly black hair and blue-grey eyes and perfect little fingers and toes. he's perfect :) sometimes he looks really asian and sometimes not, and he's got A's eyes and my sister's lips. my big sis was in labor for nearly three days but the little bambino decided he didn't want to come out that way. so he's got a little marge simpson-thing going on with his head right now from where he was stuck, which the nurses say will even out in a day or two. the nurses also say he was been eyeing the girls in the nursery while they got their baths.

my sister's response: "like father, like son."

she is recovering beautifully after surgery and was even able to nurse enzo a little bit last night, which is fantastic and unusual after a c-section. she just gazes at him and murmers, "my baby. you're my baby." A is elated and exhausted and all he can say is "if i'm this tired, i can't imagine how she feels" and while feeding him, cracking up at the mess enzo was making and saying, "man, you eat like your dad." i held him for a bit and i swear to god little enzo knows my voice ... he kept falling asleep while trying to eat and crazily everytime i whispered "wake up" to him he opened his eyes ...

U & A will probably be in the hospital until sunday, the grandparents are flooding in, and i'm so overcome with just STUFF in my head and heart that i hardly know whether to laugh, cry, or run around and squeal and dance and roll around on the ground like a crazy person. and i'm not even the one who had the baby!!!

everything, absolutely everything, is different when a new human being joins your family. everything.

bizzay

as in, off the hizzay.

my palms are bruised.

i broke my camera.

i am newly obsessed with benjamin moore's "roxbury caramel" HC-42.

my sister wants to take the subway from tribeca to columbia presbyterian when she goes into labor because it will be "more comfortable."

my parents are road tripping through the northeast.

shleepy. so shleepy. more to come later ... but one thing i must share: this weekend, in the quaint little town of Cold Spring in upstate new york, G and i sat down to dinner and i came face to face with a woman at a nearby table, wearing black spandex shorts, wool socks, tevas, a denim button down shirt, FLUFFING her MULLET before pulling on a baseball cap. fluff fluff. the restaurant lighting musta been too dim for her, because the next time i glance over she is also wearing a head lamp. strapped around her baseball capped-fluffy mullet.

sperlunking in your turkey burger, my love?

over and out.